food lion

I went to the grocery store today.

Not like it was the highlight of my day or anything, because I just got back from the Convocation. Things like that are just better not written by me about because they are so enjoyable that I know that if I try to put them into words, I will only fail miserably, and they are thus better left untouched.

So anyhow. I went to the grocery store today.

Not like my entire family went out and 'took the grocery store by storm' (as some families I am acquainted with enjoy doing), but I said, "Hey, Mom, we need milk. Can I go get some?" "Sure. Go get some milk." Mom said. And off I went. Actually, it wasn't that easy. I had to have the 'parking lot' lecture ('park close', 'park under a light', 'walk with a purpose', and 'remember you have a knife in your purse if you need it', etc...), and I received a list, and then we went and did a 20-point inspection of the truck.

And then I went to the grocery store by myself for the first time.

It is very possible that I should not be so thrilled with this. But the grocery store is an entirely different place when you are by yourself. You hear screams and shattering glass several aisles over and realize that it isn't your siblings who are playing catch with a jar of salsa. You also have the entire shopping list to yourself, rather than clutching a third of it, while wondering what the rest looks like. Your siblings cannot insist on riding on the end of the buggy while they are at home. You have time to do more interesting things. Like watching the way that people push their buggies.

Some people push buggies just for the fun of pushing buggies. They have no idea what they are doing. They just know it is lots of fun. When they come to an empty aisle, they hop on the back of the buggy and careen down it. They have no idea where anything is. Except the beer. These people get lots of speeding tickets and lots of other things in real life. Such as DUIs.

There are people who are completely oblivious. They push their buggies on the wrong side of the aisle. They cause traffic jams by staring endlessly at a can of tomato soup while standing in the middle of the aisle-- people behind them clear their throats conspicuously. They still don't move. They also run into the back of you while you are looking for condensed milk. "Oh, I'm sorry," they say, " I didn't see you." "It's okay." you mutter while rubbing the back of your heel (it is beginning to swell). These same people make you consider using hand signals whenever you plan on stopping or turning. In real life, these people get shot because they incite road rage.

There are the older people. They move very slowly. They forget to look both ways before exiting an aisle. So they run into people frequently. They are always very polite and apologize though. Sometimes, they forget where they are. They ask you if you work there. You don't. Other times, they can't reach something and they will sit there and stare at it until you ask them if they need help. They do. You get the thing for them. Then you go to the check out lane.

I had no idea that grocery stores provided such diverse cultural experiences.

I probably need to get out more often...